you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
