my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
