Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
