glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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