he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
