Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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