is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
My ATM looks so different sober.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
