8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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