HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
