don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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