my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
How's work?
Spinning.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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