We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
