Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
