hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Randomize
