its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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