im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
