I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize