hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
