Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
bring money and cleavage
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
