Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize