Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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