the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize