I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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