Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize
