I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
