This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
