just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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