so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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