fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
