just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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