You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
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