let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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