I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
