I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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