He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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