I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
