Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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