they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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