I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize