Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
