Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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