He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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