I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Success! We fucked roommates!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
