so that wasnt chicken after all
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
