Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Randomize
