im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Randomize
