I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
