I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
