Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
