So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize