We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
