with your own penis?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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